Falling and throwing my wife out of the shower pretty much killed the mood

LMAO.
:D

It has to be when i was shagging a girlfriend in a clump of bushes in the middle of town! (Too much vodka and the mood hit us) I'm pumping for all im worth and she asks to change position i say cool with me we roll over and i dip my whole nutsack right into a batch of Stinging nettles! I screamed in pain and suffice to say we didnt really finish what we were doing!

You try looking for a dock leaf in the nekkie while standing to attention! It just wasnt happening!

Instant mood breaker......

hmmm....when are you going to start that diet?????

And what diet would i be starting? what are you trying to say? does my bum look big in this?

Follow through with a fart

Lilith and Cheyanne:

I had the pleasure of doing that to a gf once - she took a phone call in her bedroom while we were "busy" and let me continue with what we were 'doing.'
I kept as quiet as I could during her call (I seem to remember it'd been her grandmother!) but when she was done she attacked me with renewed vigor! :)

If he does *anything* to my ears, it is an instant buzz kill. They are not meant for tongues or hot breath...

Otherwise, he can do just about anything to me...