i don't have to wonder if it's him in the pictures, i know it is.
but i think i see what you're asking and i can relate on another level. two actually.
there have been things i've learned about his kinky side that never fail to arouse me - and my curiosity. of course, when he tells me, my awareness of it makes that "hidden side" of him something from our past, but the shock and titillation of the
learning has been a thrill every time. and it's done nothing but make sex better on many levels.
and then there's my imagination. fantasizing about him ... doing things ... without my knowledge and well, if it wasn't a big turn on, it wouldn't be a fantasy.