Oh hell, it has to be done...screwdriver + rubberbands sound like a splint to me, call it viagra the hard way . And the tape measure is the safety device, used to make sure nothing got stretched too far during the opperation.

There, are you happy now? Now NONE of the guys here will let me near them .

First three things in my junk drawer....

AA bateries, an oven mit, and the spare key to the house.