12-05-2002, 01:09 PM
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Cynic Emeritus
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Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Hibernation
Posts: 1,279
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Rejected Children's Books
Alice in WonderBraLand
Andrew Dice Clay's Nursery Rhymes For Little People
Babar Meets the Taxidermist and Becomes a Piano
Barney the Dinosaur Gets Cancer
Barney's Big Erection
Barney's Bleeding and Nobody Can Help
The Big Golden Book Of Racial Epithets
Bob the Germ's Wonderous Journey Into and Back Out of Your Digestive System
The Boy Who Ate Spinach ...and Lived To Tell About It
The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables
The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and are Shot Dead
The Cat In The Cosmetics Testing Lab
Charles Manson Bedtime Stories
Chester: the Elf With the Detached Retina
A Children's Guide To Anal Sex
Clifford the Big Red Dog is Put to Sleep
The Complete Set Of "Mother Got Goosed" Nursery Rhymes
Controlling the Playground: Respect Through Fear
The Crack House at Pooh Corner
Crying for Dummies
Curious George And The Colostomy Bag
Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence
Dad's New Wife Timothy
Daddy Has A Dolly In His Pants
Daddy Loses His Job and Finds the Bottle
David Duke's World of Imagination
Dick, Jane, and Spot Wander into The "Hood"
Dr. Mengele's Fun Stuff To Play With Under The Kitchen Sink
The Dyslexic's Big Anagram Book
Ed Beckley's Start a Real-Estate Empire With the Change From Your Mom's Purse
Egghead - And Other Things Mrs. Dumpty Gave Humpty
Enticing Young Children To Get In Your Car For Dummies (A For Reference For The Rest Of Us)
A Field Guide to Infectious Diseases Of The Third World
The Fluffy Little Kitten And The Pit Bull
Friendly Fun Science Projects With Large, Heavy, Jagged, Rusty, Metal Things
The Frog Formerly Known as Prince
Furious George Delivers the Mail
Girls Are From Venus, Boys Are From Cootieland
Good Morning Mr. Hitler!
Green Eggs And Gonorrhea
The Hardy Boys, Nancy Drew, and the Vice Squad
Hi Mr. Knife!
How Come Grandma Smells Like Piss?
How to Become The Dominant Military Power In Your Elementary School
The J. Edgar Hoover Dress-Up Book
James And The Giant Scrotum
Joe Camel and The Magic Cancer Stick
John Wayne Gacy's Clown Party Festival
The KY Jelly Clubhouse
The Legend of Three-Card Monte
Legends of Scab Football
Let's All Play The Famine Game!
Let's Draw Betty and Veronica Without Their Clothes On
Let's Visit A Gay Bath House!
The Little Big Book of Necrophilia
The Little Engine That Could Becomes Intoxicated and Kills Civilians
The Little Engine That Could, If Only That Damned Gout Would Go Away
The Little Princess Who Was Good In Bed
Little Timmy Goes Though The Windshield, Fly Timmy, Fly!
Madeline's Prison Shower Room Adventure
Marching Songs Of The 3rd Reich Sing-A-Long Book
Maybe Dick
My Sticker Book Of Vaginas (companion to My Sticker Book Of Penises)
Naptime Orgy In A Pile Of Woobies
Peter Rabbit's Frisky Adventures
A Pictoral History of Circus Geek Suicides
Pogo The Pygmy's Open Vaginal Sores
Pop! Goes The Hamster... and Other Great Microwave Games
The Pop-up Book of Human Anatomy
The Rainy Day Activity Book Of Things You Can Insert In Your Rectum
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer's Games of Revenge
Safe Sex And The Zip-Lock bag
Squeako The Dolphin and The Canning Factory
Teddy Bare Gets Undressed
Testing Home Made Parachutes With Nothing At All But Your Household Pets
The Tickling Babysitter
Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will
Those Great Childhood Fragrances... Apple Pie, Cotton Candy And Bicycle Seats
Timmy The Tapeworm and the Barium Enema
The Unabomber Pop-Up Manifesto and Coloring Book
Valuable Protein and Other Nutritional Benefits of Things from your Nose
When Mommy Leaves Daddy, And What You Did to Cause It
Where in the New York Area is Jimmy Hoffa?
Where In The World Are Daddy's Guns?
Where The Tonsil Jockeys Are
Where the Wildings Are
Where's Waldo's Weewee?
Why Mommy And Daddy Have To Sacrifice You To Satan
Why Your Mommy Is A Crack Whore
You Were Born In A Test Tube
Your DNA Indicates You Will Get Addicted To Something By Age 17
__________________
CK
"Women, you can't live with them ... pass the beer nuts." - Norm Peterson (George Wednt) on Cheers
"Sometimes you just have to say, what the fuck." - Tom Cruise in Risky Business
"It tastes so good. Once it hits your lips." - Frank the Tank in Old School
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